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The Norwood Builder - Will Analysis if the story was set today

The Norwood Builder contains one of my favourite pieces of Holmesian deduction - the part where Holmes explains to Lestrade how a document was written on a train.

Given the state of the UK railways these days I thought I'd redraft the passage to reflect the modern train travel experience:

Holmes had picked up the pages which formed the rough draft of the will, and was looking at them with the keenest interest upon his face.

"There are some points about that document, Lestrade, are there not?" said he, pushing them over.

The official looked at them with a puzzled expression.

"I can read the first few lines and these in the middle of the second page, and one or two at the end. Those are as clear as print," said he, "but the writing in between is very bad, and there are three places where I cannot read it at all."

"What do you make of that?" said Holmes.

"Well, what do YOU make of it?"

"That it was written in a train. The good writing represents stations where he sat as the announcer kept changing which platform the train would be arriving at, the bad writing represents movement where he was knocked by the man next to him fiddling with his iPod, and the very bad writing represents being knocked by people with rucksacks.

“A scientific expert would pronounce at once that this was drawn up on a suburban line, since nowhere save in the immediate vicinity of a great city could there be so quick

a succession of rucksacks and platform alterations. Granting that his whole journey was

occupied in drawing up the will, then the train was an express, only stopping once between Norwood and London Bridge."

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